In Which Amy Lives with Cara

Guess where I am.

I bet you can't guess.

I'll give you a minute.

(cue "Jeopardy" theme music)

I'm at Cara's house!!

Yeah, that's right. I'm here for the Christmas break. I'm so excited to be here; it's gonna be awesome.

Mostly because I don't have to do anything.

No, seriously, Cara is totally a Cruise Director and has set up playdates and daytrips and all type of cool things for us to do with the kids. Not only that, she's offered to watch Lizzie if I want to go off and do things by myself.

Dude, I want to marry Cara. Does anyone think Bill would mind?

Comfort Zone

I know that this is going to sound so cliche, but I'm going to say it anyway.

Being a mother has made me a better person.

I wear swimsuits in public and I introduce myself to women with children. I swing and slide and sing and dance. I plan trips and join clubs. I bake and try new recipes. I can function in chaos and can get through a day on a few hours of sleep. I jump on dirty trampolines and wait on long lines to go on rides that spin. I prioritize and multitask. Snot on my shoulder and dust on my floor, I don't take these things too seriously. All this is a far cry from the person I was five years ago.

A few weeks ago, I registered Will for soccer on-line. It was the last day to register. It was 11:45 pm.

Part of the application process required a parenting volunteer committment. Working the snack bar, painting lines on the field, being a coach-- that sort of thing. There was also an option to fork over $30 and skip the 'volunteer duties'.

I checked off the box for coach.

Without knowing how many players belong on the field. Without knowing what 'off-sides' means. Without knowing positions or placement. Without knowing when your supposed to throw it in or kick it in or whatever.

Without ever officially playing any organized sport, let alone soccer.

Last year, I showed up for soccer games with a big cup of coffee and a comfy beach chair. I cheered and chatted. Took pictures and watched. It was fun and relaxing.

Today, I was all anxiety and jitters. Squeezing soccer rules out of my husband, eating handfuls of chocolate chips and checking the website twenty times to confirm the field location and game time. It was a far cry from last year. I was way out of my comfort zone. What was I thinking?

We showed up, Will and I. We got our shirts and I introduced myself to the dad I'd be coaching with. I made some nervous comment about how I know absolutely nothing about soccer. He didn't appear to be amused. He knew what he was doing and he was kind of all business. Within a few minutes, I started to relax and realize that this was a match made in heaven.

He set up the drills and took care of the logistics. I cheered for the kids and doled out high fives. He demonstrated skills and I gathered the kids up and made sure they were listening. I learned their names quickly and called them by name, paying special attention to the kids that lagged behind. I ran up and down the field, trying to usher the kids in the right direction and heaping tons of praise and pats on the back. The kids seemed happy and proud and although it's not supposed to matter, we totally won.

And you know what? I was kind of awesome.

And you know what else? I can't wait for next week.

I want to be a role model for my kids. I want to get out and try new things. I want to be healthy and happy and active. I want to join and volunteer and participate. I want all of these things for myself because ultimately I want these things for them.

In the moment, it may not be the easiest thing-- but I really love how being a mom has pushed me outside of my comfort zone.

Good Stuff

If you're on Team Facebook, then you know those people. The people who scrunch up their nose and roll their eyes at the mere mention of the site. The people that say they're "too busy" or "too private". The people that shrug their shoulders and claim that they "don't get it". You know, the Facebook haters.

And I respect their opinion. I get it. It's not for everyone.

I guess it's possible that some people have enough "social" in their social lives. That some people have all the "friends" that they can handle. That some people can maintain long distance relationships with friends and acquaintances over many years and many miles without it. I am just not one of those people.

I joined Facebook a little over two years ago. In a slightly therapeutic way, it became an outlet. A place to share the good, the bad and the ugly. A place to meet up with old friends and a place to get to know new friends better. A place to connect with others. A place where I could commune with friends in different locations and with different lifestyles. Also a place where I could commiserate with other moms and discuss the joys and challenges of being wives and mothers.

Upon joining, I set out to find some old friends from high school. I was really excited about the idea of reconnecting with Amy. We were friends in middle school and high school. That was over fifteen years ago, so the details of our past were sketchy. But I remembered the big things. Like how hanging out was easy and fun. How we could write each other three page notes, neatly folded into triangular formation, in the span of one class period. How I could laugh and smile until my face hurt. Good stuff.

So we reconnected on-line. And as expected, it was awesome.

We posted snapshots of our lives. We shared our thoughts and ideas. We "met" each other's kids and husbands. We bonded over our similar outlooks on being married and having children. I found myself laughing out loud and looking forward to her comments and messages. When things were particularly crazy or frustrating, I found myself messaging her directly and ultimately feeling better about the situation at hand. We started this blog together and I started referring to Amy as my internet-bff.

Two years and a few failed attempts later, and we actually had hard and fast plans to get together. For this weekend. So after over fifteen years, we were actually going to come face to face.

It was at this point that I realized that I could never have done the whole on-line dating thing. I could, however, have totally fallen into the never-leave-the-house-solely-communicate-with-people-from-the-computer-in-your-basement lifestyle.

At the end of the night, it's so easy to sit on my couch with my laptop. Dishes in the sink, toys on the floor. Wearing sweats and old socks. Typing back and forth. Kind of hanging out. You know, except for the fact that you're not. There's no instant feedback-- no eye contact, no reading the other person's expressions or physical cues. Having unlimited time to think of what you want to say and how you want to say it. And when you run out of things to say, you simply don't say anything. Log off, stop typing, whatever.

My main concern was whether our on-line chemistry would translate to in-person chemistry. My minor concerns included, but were not limited to: what to wear, when to clean my house, what to cook and how our husbands and kids would get along.

Fortunately, after a few minutes of initial obligatory awkwardness, we had such a great day. Beautiful weather, happy kids, plenty of food and good stories and conversation. Even the guys had a good time.

It was easy and fun and the time flew.

Amy was as smart and snarky and hysterical as I remembered. We talked and laughed and shared stories. It was natural and easy and I didn't feel like I had to work to keep up. (As a reader of this blog, you must know however, that as much as she protests life in the MOFN-- she does have a secret love for Nascar, country music and... for the love of God... fantasy football.) Erick was charming and funny and when given the opportunity to watch four channels of ESPN on the couch, he actually opted to hang with us, in the dining room, over coffee. Wow. Lizzie is the sweetest and without a doubt the most polite and mature little girl I have ever met. She totally hung with my wild boys and even indulged my Pokemon-crazed five year old with his obsession. The fact that she's never been in school or daycare is a total testament to Amy's awesome mom skills.

So we packed them up and walked them out and they headed off for their last night in New Jersey.

And sadly, now the whole Facebook thing is a little bittersweet. It once seemed like a totally great way to interact and hang with an old friend. But now, I totally want my internet-bff to come over for a cup of coffee and a chat. To hang at the park with our kids. To hire the kids a sitter and go to a hockey game with the guys. You know, good stuff.

The only problem is that pesky six-hour drive.

So I guess we're sticking with Facebook.

For now.

Vacation 2010, Part Nine

We're baaack.

And as it turns out, it's much easier to write about your vacation when you're actually ON vacation.

We got home late Saturday night and had to hit the ground running. Unloading, unpacking, cleaning, organizing, shopping... we're not even close to being ready.

I went back to work today, but I wanted to write one last post about our time away.

I wanted to write about how the kids fought for two weeks straight about who was going to push the elevator buttons.

I wanted to write about how Will kneeled in a puddle of pink dye when we were tie-dying. And how I convinced him that it was a jellyfish sting and that he had some sort of super-human immunity-- thus relaxing him about swimming in the ocean. He then proceeded to tell EVERYONE, even complete strangers, about his 'superpower'.

I wanted to write about how Liam has become so attached to his swimming tube that he carried it everywhere-- and even insisted on sleeping with it.

I wanted to write about how the kids would ring the doorbell of our vacant condo every time we arrived home so that the toys (who were alive a la Toy Story) would know to go back to their spots and "freeze".

I wanted to write about how Will had a meltdown on the floor of a Virginia Wawa. Freaking out because someone touched his flip-flop and now he's got germs. Did I mention that he was flipping out about germs while lying on the floor of a freaking Wawa?

Like I said, I wanted to write about these things. But now that the time constraints and pressures of work are upon me, I just don't have it in me. Instead, I'll just wrap things up with a few of our favorite final photos.

If you've been reading over these past few weeks, thanks for coming along for the ride.

Will takes the plunge.

Will and Anthony.

They're so far out and the water is still calm and shallow.

Cousins.

"To Infinity and Beyond!"

Also, one of my favorite photos... ever.

Liam.

Technically, not a great photo... but I still love it.

Clearly, Liam has a way with women.

Family shot.

The looong ride home.

Vacation 2010, Part Eight

Being five has its privileges.

The resort that we're staying at offers various activities during the day. And being that Will just turned five, he was finally old enough to take part.

We made tie dye shirts earlier in the week.

Wearing plastic gloves + sitting on a plastic tarp in the sun + 100 degree heat = FUN!

Before.

After.

We played Bingo...

He attributes his success to The Force.

He won a gourmet cupcake and

gift certificates to a breakfast buffet and Art Cafe.

At breakfast.

At the Art Cafe.

He picked out a treasure chest and three little fish to go inside.

Three little fish.

He painted the bottom.

I painted the top.

Once he saw the table sitting by the pool, Will has been begging to play "Pong Pong". We didn't correct him because we found this incredibly hilarious.

Playing pong pong.

Diaper wearing, trash talking two year old.

As you might have guessed, there wasn't much of a volley.

Still talking trash. What?!

And lastly, turtle races. The organizers drew two concentric circles and the racers placed their turtles in the inner ring. Whichever turtle made it out of the outer ring was declared the winner.

Picking his turtle.

Getting ready.

The race begins.

The turtle jockey at work.

Will was eliminated in the second round. His prize was a single Silly Band and 2 pieces of candy. But after the haul he took in Bingo, he wasn't complaining.

Vacation 2010, Part Seven

With a few exceptions, it's basically all about the beach, the pool and the ice cream around here.

Last Wednesday, the local theater was offering a change of pace. A free family movie-- "Furry Vengeance"-- with Brendan Fraser. Liam has been to three or four movies in the last couple months-- all animated, so this was a long shot. We went to theater and as we got settled, we prepared ourselves with an exit plan and meeting arrangments should Liam not make it through.

We were sitting there for all of five minutes when I texed this photo to the internets...

... bragging that all I needed was a car seat and a big bag of popcorn to get my barely-two-year-old through a movie. Surely, I jinxed myself.

About thirty minutes into the movie, Liam started chanting, "I want Buzz. I want Buzz. I WANT BUZZ." He's seen the Toy Story movies roughly six-thousand times, so clearly it's his movie of choice. I'm no movie critic, but I assure you that Furry Vengence is no Toy Story.

So within about a half hour, we went from this...

to this...

I spent awhile chasing Liam around the shopping mall that houses the local theater. Then I remembered the toy store that's just around the corner. And it occurred to me that it's way easier to chase a two-year-old in air conditioning than outside with the 110 degree heat index. So into the toy store we went.

I'm not sure why, but both of my boys have always had a thing for doll houses.

And strollers.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

In order to allow Will to partake in some 'big kid' activities, we had planned to split up a few times during the trip. Will has been begging to go play mini-golf all summer and there are a bunch of courses here.

So one night, Will and I headed off to mini golf and Bill and Liam went off on the bike to do some shopping.

On our way to mini golf.

About fifteen minutes later, Bill texted me this photo along with the message, "I'm at a McDonald's drive-thru with Liam on my bike!!!"

Oh boy. Look at Liam. He's two and even he knows this is just wrong.

Meanwhile, Will and I pulled into the mini golf parking lot. Will had a minor meltdown when he learned that we would be eating dinner first at a nearby restaurant. However he quickly recovered when he learned that there would be coloring, ravioli and ice cream.

Another guy too distracted to talk at dinner.

Getting schooled in tic-tac-toe.

I totally asked the waitress to take this picture.

After dinner, we headed over to golf.

Going for a birdie.

The course we were at had lots of water features and traps. The object, of course, is to keep your ball out of the water. However when your five, I suppose that it's much more fun to hit your ball into the water.

"Whoops!" he says, as he hits his ball into the water for the 78th time.

"I'll get it, Mom!"

"Got it!"

And as is customary in first-time mini golf outings, the winner shall receive a glorious trophy.

Meet Crabby, our six thousandth stuffed animal.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Later in the week, it was Bill's turn to spend some 1-on-1 time with Will. So they went on their annual waverunner trip.

Last year.

Bill not looking at the camera.

This year.

Again with Bill not looking at the camera.

Upon pulling up to the marina, I realized that I had made a critical mistake. I forgot the stroller. This was almost a dealbreaker. But ultimately, I spent quite a bit of time juggling Liam and the camera-- trying to take pictures while trying not to lose my 2-year-old off the dock.

Some more "waverunner pictures".

And here is a "chasing Liam" picture.

Once the big boys were headed to the bay, we headed to breakfast.

Harassing the waitresses again.

"To infinity and beyond..."

Whoa. They don't make pancakes like this in Jersey.

Take note. If ever visiting South Carolina, the pancakes are bigger than your head.

Your welcome.