Life is Sticky. Life is Sweet.

Life is Sticky. Life is Sweet.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Everyone Uses New Phrases as a Parent

Phrases I never thought I'd utter until I became a mom:
1. "Put your clothes on right now!" (Also known as the "I'm NAK-KID!! I'm NAK-KID!!" moments)
2. "You can have ice cream for lunch if you let me take a shower." (I will use bribery to be able to clean myself)
3. "Don't make me come in there!" (It's so cliched, but I really do say it. A lot)
4. "Get down off the counter before you fall and kill yourself." (Lizzie's a bit of a climber. And fearless)
5. "Do you have a poopy butt? Turn around and let me look." (Self-explanatory)
6. "Don't cry, baby. It's just a little puke." (Said most often when covered with vomit that stinks of oyster crackers and apple juice)
7. "You better stay in bed or Daddy will come in there." (This is only said Friday through Sunday nights since I'm usually at school at bedtime)
8. "Okay, I'll call Santa and let him know." (Been saying this a lot lately as Lizzie has suddenly realized that requests to 'Santa' will produce presents at the end of the year)
9. "Sorry. My daughter helped." (Used to explain pen scribble on homework, which was greeted with hysterical laughter from teacher{s})
10. "No. We're staying outside." (Anyone who knows me knows I'm more of an "indoor girl.")
What are some phrases you find yourself using as a parent that makes you:
a. Cringe
b. Shake your head in amazement


  1. "THAT is unacceptable behavior" Said in a stern voice, with a serious face, would stop my kids cold in their tracks. I had NO idea it would work- and once it did, I saved it for special occasions. Amy's Mom.

  2. " it's _______ or nothing" works every time


    "Don't use butter knives to feed the baby!"

  3. I am especially fond of the bribery. In moments of desperation, I can't even admit what I have offered up. great post!

  4. Once, on the morning after a work function in which all us co-workers got unintentionally hammered, I announced in the hotel room, "I haven't drank that much since I was pregnant!" (meaning I hadn't drank that much since BEFORE I was pregnant).


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